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Repunzel Part 3

Part 1
Part 2

Repunzel Part 2

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Part 3

Repunzel Part 1

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Part 3

Makna disebalik kata2 Wanita

1. Kalau perempuan tanya: Lawa ke budak pompuan tu? Makna tersembunyi: Siapa yang paling lawa? I ke,budak pompuan tu? 2. Kalau perempuan tanya: You dah makan ke belum? Makna tersembunyi: Jom pi makan. Lapar ni! 3. Kalau perempuan kata: Lawa-lawa la baju kat sini, yek. Makna tersembunyi: Belikanlah untuk I. 4. Kalau perempuan kata: Rasa macam nak pening la. Makna tersembunyi: Tolong picit kepala. 5. Kalau perempuan kata: Letihnya hari ni. Mana nak masak, basuh kain-baju lagi... Makna tersembunyi: Kita makan kat luar jelah. Lepas tu, tolong basuh kain-baju sekali, yek. 6. Kalau perempuan kata: Kita lebih sesuai berkawan saja. Makna tersembunyi: I tak nak kat you. Tak paham-paham ke? 7. Kalau perempuan kata: I suka berkawan dengan you. You baik,memahami bla bla bla... Makna tersembunyi: Hish... I rasa macam minat sesangat kat you aku rasa macam nak jadi awek you je. 8. Kalau perempuan tanya: You pernah tak teringatkan awek you yang dulu? Makna tersembunyi: Kalau nak gaduh, kalau berani sangat, sebut la nama dia depan aku. 9. Kalau perempuan kata: I sanggup berkorban demi kebahagiaan you. Makna tersembunyi: Amboi! Aku kena berkorban.Habih, hangpa dua ekoq gak yang seronok. 10. Kalau perempuan kata: I tak kisah kalau memang betul you nak kahwin lagi satu. Asalkan you berterus-terang dengan I, bersikap jujur dan berlaku adil. Makna tersembunyi: siapa kata aku tak kisah? Adil ke tak adil,aku tak kira! Langkah mayat aku dulu sebelum nak menikah lagi satu.

Cikgu & Murid2...

Cikgu: hari ni cikgu Amir tidak datang, saya gantikan dia...korang semua boleh buat kerja sendiri..jangan bising!!!
Murid: ***tengah bising
Cikgu: kenapa cikgu masih dengar korang bercakap??
Murid: sebab cikgu ada telinga
Cikgu: ***lalu merotan murid2..
Murid: kenapa cikgu rotan kita orang???
Cikgu: sebab cikgu ada rotan...

Orang gaji & Datin...

Perbualan antara org gaji n puan rumah Datin Maimun kedaung mintak naik gaji... Bibik : "Datin, saya nak minta naik gaji...!" Datin : "kenapa saya harus naikkan gaji kamu?" Bibik : "ada 3 alasan nyonya..! Pertama saya membersihkan rumah lebih bersih daripada Datin." Datin : "Siapa yang cakap?". Bibik : "Dato' yang cakap". Datin : Oh? (sambil menahan amarah) Bibik : "Kedua, saya memasak lebih sedap daripada Datin". Datin : "Siapa yg cakap?". Bibik : "Dato' yg cakap". Datin : oh? (..ggrrrrrkkk..!!!..) Bibik : "Ketiga, saya di ranjang lebih hebat daripada Datin". Datin : oh?! "Dato' juga yang cakap ker?". Bibik : "Bukan Datin.. Razman, rumah bujang sebelah rumah yang cakap, katanya Datin kurang hebat di ranjang" Datin : "ssssstt!!! Kamu mintak nak naik berapa?"

Wasiat

Hadi sedang nazak dan hampir meninggal… Di sebelahnya Imah, isterinya sedang menemani Hadi… Hadi : “Imah.. sebelum aku mati nanti.. aku ingin berpesan padamu..” Isteri : “Iya, bang.. cakaplah..” Hadi : “Aku mau kau kahwin dengan Harun…” “Isk abang nie.. kan Harun tu musuh ketat abang selama ini?! Apa abang rela menyerahkan saya kepadanya?” dengan terkejut isterinya bertanya. “Aku ingin dia menderita seperti yang aku alami 30 tahun bersamamu…”

How to we get rid of blackheads and whiteheads

Maintaining a clear and beautiful skin, takes time, consistency and effort. Dermatologist may recommend lots of products, but some of them can be expensive and may actually take a long time to work. You can, however, incorporate some home remedies for blackheads and whiteheads into your daily beauty regimen and in a few weeks, you will experience a drastic reduction or even total elimination of the problem.

● Toothpaste – Toothpaste is an effective blackhead and whitehead remover. Apply a thin paste to your infected areas and let it sit on your face for at least 25 minutes. You will probably feel a burning sensation when you apply the toothpaste, but this is normal and will pass. Once you remove the toothpaste, the top of your blackheads and whiteheads will disappear, but you still need to thoroughly wash your face to remove the buildup underneath. Repeat this home remedy every other day for two weeks.

● Tomato – Tomatoes have natural antiseptic properties that dry up whiteheads and blackheads. Peel and mash a small tomato. Apply the tomato pulp to your blackheads and whiteheads before going to bed. Leave the tomato pulp on your face while you sleep and then wash your face in warm water in the morning.

● Lemon -Wash your face in warm water. Then, squeeze the juice of one lemon into a bowl. Add in a pinch of salt and stir the mixture. Apply the mixture to your blackheads and whiteheads. Leave the mixture on for approximately 20 minutes and then wash your face with warm water again.

● Lime – You can also use equal parts of lime juice and cinnamon powder and apply this mixture to blackheads. Leave it on overnight and rinse it off in the morning

● Cornstarch – Mix about a three-to-one cornstarch to vinegar ratio into a paste. Apply it to your problem areas and let sit for 15 to 30 minutes. Remove the paste with warm water and a washcloth.

● Yogurt - Mix three tablespoons of plain yogurt with two tablespoons of oatmeal. Add one teaspoon of olive oil and one tablespoon of lemon juice to the mixture. Stir the mixture thoroughly and apply it to the effective area of the face. Let the mixture sit for five to seven minutes then rinse off with cold water.

● Almond or oatmeal – Mix either oatmeal or almond powder with just enough rose water to make a spreadable paste. Apply it to your problem areas with your fingertips first and then apply it to the rest of your face. Let it set for about 15 minutes and then rinse your face with cold water.

● Rice – Soak rice in milk for 5 hours and then grind this in a blender until it is paste-like in consistency. Use the paste as a scrub on affected areas of the body.

● Potatoes – Grate raw potatoes and then rub the area with the mixture. Wash it off after 15 minutes.

● Fenugreek leaves – Crush some fenugreek leaves and mix with water to form a paste. Put this on the face for 15 minutes and then remove it. Do this every night to keep your face free of blackheads.

● Coriander leaves – Mix some coriander leaves and a little turmeric powder with water and form a paste. Use this as a mask to eliminate blackheads.

● Oatmeal -Grind oatmeal into a powder in a blender and then add some rose water. Use this on affected areas for 15 minutes and then wash it off with cold water.

● Baking soda – Prepare a mixture of equal parts of baking soda and water and rub it onto your face or other body areas prone to blackheads. Leave it on for 15 minutes and then rinse it off with warm water.

● Honey is also good for removing blackheads. Spread honey on the affected area and remove it after 15 minutes.

Remember – Be gentle to your skin. Never pinch, scrape, poke, press, or squeeze too hard!

Good Manners lesson..

During class, a teacher trying to teach good manners, asks the students: 
"Students, If you were on a date, having supper with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom? Michael?" Michael: "Just a minute, I have to go pee." Teacher: "That would be rude and impolite!!! Teacher: "What about you Peter? How would you say it?" Peter: "I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom, I'll be right back." Teacher: "That's better, but it's still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the dinner table. And you Little Johnny, are you able to use your intelligence for once and show us your good manners?" Johnny: "I would say: 'Darling, may I please be excused for a moment? I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, who I hope you'll get to meet after supper. " The teacher fainted!!

Status FB

Kalau binatang ada fb, agak-agak begini lah ya komen-komen binatang tersebut kat STATUS yg mcm kowang selalu post tu....... Cicak : Tuan rumah baru beli reket elektrik, gua kenduri nyamuk BBQ mlm nih... Nyamuk : Baru habis ronda rumah Ajoi... kenyang burppp Aedes: Baru jer selamat bagi injekan maut, yeah!!! Ayam: Tidaaaaaaaaaaaak, Besok majikan gua mau buat kenduri kesyukuran, gua mau di sembeliiiiihhh! ... Cicak : isteriku tersepit pintu Kucing Betina: "Anak i yang ke-5 baru tanya siapa bapaknya. I bingung nak jawab apa. I sendiri lupa bapaknya siapa." Ayam : Kawan2...kalu esok guwe tak update...bererti guwe udah di goreng....I luv u all... jangan luper wat kenduri arwah untuk I yaa... Nyamuk: Siot, sekali drug addict gua hantam daaaa. Gua positif HIV AIDS... uwaaaaaaa Cicak : Mau ke ke bilik air anak tuan rumah jap ... baru beli videocam baru ... Kucing: Baru je add awek sebelah umah... keturunan PARSI beb!!! Tikus: Operasi malam ni... selongkar kitchen kabinet... sape nak ikot? katak : malam ni nk wat konsert la..da lama x ujan ni..hangat oii.. ular : rasa mcm nk makan lauk telo la malam ni..mana nk cari ek.. Anjing: Aku tension bila ada mat rempit berkumpul tepi rumah aku tiap malam. Nak tido pun x senang hanjeng punya org. Kuda: Patah kaki; Rider aku bangang salah timing bila nak lompat pagar, sekarang rehat kat kandang. Kura-kura: Aku sakit hati bila bini aku berjalan. Lembab mcm siput babi Siput babi: Aku sakit hati bila bini aku bergerak. Lembab mcm kura2 Gagak: Tadi jumpa ayam KFC. Jangan jeles Burung Kakak Tua: Penat betul nk ubah stigma masyarakat. Walaupun aku Burung Kakak Tua, tapi aku burung Jantan!!! Babi hutan: susah betul nak cari makanan halal sekarang ni. Kera: semalam GF aku bagi bunga. Sedap jugak kunyah Tikus: Aku makan mee goreng mamak kat Al Naz maju@precint 9. Meh la join sekali. Lalat: Asyik hurung bangkai je. Alhamdulillah hari ni jumpa nasi bungkus. Sotong; Aku bengang bila tapak sulaiman ejek aku si lembut kucing : update petang karang tepat jam 5.00pm slow ngendap ala2 pink panther nyurik ikan bawal kepunyaan kaklelamajnun. .. lipas : merasmikan pengunaan kepak baru sekali bila dikembangkn. ..gerun tengok mmber aku kene tarik dgn jeli2 panjang kepunyaan cik cicak..eee seram nyeee.... itik serati : hahahhaa lawak2 ayam serama tu ade hati jalan tersengguk2. ...nk tiru aku le tu.. lol.... Ikan laga: Boring sey, duduk sorang2 dalam tanki ni. Ikan parang; Kurang asam punya manusia, letak gambar aku kat depan bekas keropok Ikan Jerung: Kenapa x de sorang pun nak add/approve aku. :-( Ikan Sepat: Terkenang jiran sebelah yang dah dijadikan ikan pekasam... Ikan Bilis: Wah ramainya kawan kita. Tahniah remy, ko kawan aku yang ke 5000. Ikan Arowana: Cantik tak sisik I? Cantik kan ? Ikan Mas Koki: macam mana nak kurus nie?

Woii!! Lembu!!

Seorang lelaki tengah bawak kereta , tiba2 ada seorang perempuan bawak kereta potong kereta dia . Lelaki tuu jerit '' woi Lembuuuuuuuu '' !! Perempuan tuu balas balik '' hang tuu kambing, keldai, monyet, orang utan " !! Tiba2 perempuan tuu eksiden terlanggar sekawan lembu , Lelaki : kan aku cakap LEMBU,LEMBU ! tuu laa x nak dengar! MORAL OF THE STORY ?

Blecky

Di sebuah rumah sakit jiwa,seorang doktor sedang memerhatikan para pesakitnya.seorang pesakit kelihatan sedang menyeret sesuatu seolah2 sedang membawa anjing peliharaannya. Doktor : apa khabar anjing awak..bawa dia jalan2 yer. Pesakit : ini seliparlah doktor, bukan anjing Doktor : syukurlah kamu sudah sembuh Doktor pun meninggalkan pesakitnya.si pesakit lalu berbisik pada selipar buruk yg diseretnya. "hahaha..kita berjaya menipu doktor tuh kan Blecky.."

Sam VS Hantu...

SAM: Semalam aku nampak hantu! DOL: Uih! kau terkejut tak? SAM: Taklah.... hantu tu yang terkejut tengok aku. ... DOL: Mana kau tahu? SAM: Aku tengok muka dia pucat semacam jer....

Kisah Orang Asli Dan Polis

Orang asli : selamat pagi tuan Polis : selamat pagi Polis : apa hal Orang asli : saya nak buat repot tuan Polis : fasal apa tu Orang asli : kawan saya di baham harimau Polis : pukul berapa Orang asli : dia tak pukul, terkam Polis : habis? Orang asli : tak habis, tinggal kepala Polis : $%^$%$#$*#$#…